1976 Chevy ElCamino 454 "Street Beast"!

I should start by saying that if you are looking for a “Pajama party Barbie Jeep” you my friend. should keep looking. If you are looking for a short description of to the beast before you. I can offer you two words “MEAT & POTATOES”. This is the All American chariot of the free world. You are not dealing with any ordinary. cookie cutter Elcamino son. This thing was forged from a single block of all American Tungsten Steel. Real sturdy! From that day forward my life has never been the same. Winch yourself off that couch and see if you can handle this Big Block Elcamino. So if you are looking for a rice burning hatch back. a solar powered liberal mobile. or even a Hyundai crossover keep on looking my friend this thing is a piece of red white and blue Americana Machinery. This baby’s pulse is pumping 454 C. I. of uncensored raw fuel through her 8 Cylinder nuclear power plant. And rest assured this is no metro feminine automatic. . . you command her to obey. with your calloused hand planted firmly on the shifter. And she will obey. the first time. every time. If you can’t handle th B&M shifter. you better not ferry skip over here wanting to test drive her. If you stall her out. you can count on getting hit in the face with a piece of re-bar and sent back where you came from. It has A/C but missing some parts. nbsp;are you kidding me…. Really! If you want to blow the sweat off your brow. you do it the old fashioned way: windows down. back window open. “What if it rains?”. . . You whiney bitch! I told you to stop reading. . . Any man who drives this beast doesn’t give a damn about rain. Not even skin melting acid rain. Cause he’s already dripping wet in blood. sweat. dip spit. and fish guts. If you are looking for the kind of car that has to be pansy parked in the garage. so the “paint dont get ruined” Then you should plant your Obama sticker on some Japanese piece of s***. Cause this thing has A custom satin black. krylon spray can paint job. thats rite. spray bomb hot rod heavy chevy satin black. Let the blood drain out from the buffalo you just killed. with your bare hands. Because you are William Wallace from Braveheart and when you get home you can leave your “sissy sponge glove car wash kit” in the pink bucket it came in. If you’re thinking about Mexican chrome bumpers for her. think again. The front bumper basher came off a laguna and the back is stock. Has the laguna console and swivel bucket seats. And forget about putting one of those “Piss on Ford” stickers on this machine cause when you’re spotted in this American Classic there will be no questions. no further explanation required. people will understand and get out of your way. . …real quick. If you think you’re ready to park this panty hauler on your tract of land. If you buy this heavy chevy you better go get your old lady ready for some damn changes around your lair. cause this s** will be happening. What will be Happening? Glad you asked…. 1. More chest hair. 2. You’re growing a beard. 3. Meat Only Diet. 4. T-Rex for a pet. 5. You’re taking a job at the lumber mill. 6. Your car carries five kegs. 7. [Expletive Deleted] 8. Catch more fish. 9. Wire bristled toothbrush. 10. Sex in the yard. 11. Sex in the garage. 12. All male offspring. 13. Chiseled jaw line. 14. Not giving a damn. 15. Flesh turning to steel. 16. Higher salary 17. Promotions. 18. Better looking wives. 19. Better looking mistresses. 20. More golfing 21. More killing stuff. 22. More dead animals in the KITCHEN freezer. 23. More tools in your garage. 24. Bigger TV 25. Wife takes out the trash 26. Four Wheel Drive 27. Wife brings trash can in from road. 28. Wife stops bitching about clothes on floor. 29. Wife stocks fridge with beer. 30. Chuck Norris. 31. John McCain 32. Steaks for dinner. 33. Winning the Lottery. 34. Women on the side. 35. Wrestling with bea 36. Building sh** out of stone. 37. Riding Lawn Mower. 38. Bon Fires in cul-de-sac. 39. Bar Fights. 40. Wife picks you up from Thee Gentlemen’s Club. 41. Craftsman Tools. 42. Jay Bisset. 43. Welding stuff. 44. Digging holes. 45. Huge Piece of meat. Put your GPS back in your purse. Sounds good doesn’t it?This Beast has carried me through 155. 00 miles of battlefield twice as gruesome as the second half of the movie “300″. . . And just like a trusty steed this juggernaut has never left me stranded. If you think you’ve worn her out you drag this beast back to me in any condition. And Ill handle the rest. But if you think you’re going to get to whip this mule you better pony up $4500. . . American Cash. I’m not selling you this car unless you are clearly a pure blooded American Species. so don’t even think about it.